There are three main Pillars to establish a healthy relationship and a firm foundation in marriage, Passion, Intimacy and Commitment..  The normal cycle is to move from Passion to Intimacy to Commitment over a period of time, allowing opportunities to get to know each other and to establish trust.  Once a relationship moves to the Commitment Pillar then the real joy of being together begins as you create and plan a life together based on Passion and Intimacy and the security of Marriage.  If you find your Marriage does not have these three Pillars then your relationship is out of balance and will crumble.  There is hope though, when both partners desire to rebuild the foundation, for a Marriage to regain it’s health and continue.

PILLAR I:  PASSION

• The motivational side of love
• The spine tingling sensation that creates romance
• Sensual in nature
• Sexual play
• Characterized by physiological arousal and intense desire for each other
• Can be possessive
• Often keeps a relationship together or when not present causes it to end.
• The “HOT” of love
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            How to Cultivate Passion

1. Practice meaningful touch
2. Plan mutually enjoyable experiences
3. Compliment your partner daily
4. Learn what pleases your partner sexually and practice it.
5. Find ways to be romantic outside of  the bedroom
6. Appreciate each other’s uniqueness
7. Express to your partner:
   ”I am crazy about you”
   
   

Cultivating Passion Increases Intimacy

PILLAR II: INTIMACY

·        Emotional side of love           

·        Partner is “best friend” or “soul mate”

·        Fills our heart’s deepest longings for closeness and acceptance

·        Really “knowing” your partner—what the Bible calls “one flesh”

·        Involves emotional risk

      ·        With out intimacy there is isolation and aloneness

·        Fulfillment of love hinges on intimacy

·        The “WARM” of love
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  How to Cultivate Intimacy

1. Become “best friends”; share dreams, interests, fears, hopes
2. Spend time together
3. Really listen—to the feelings as well as the words
4. Practice unconditional acceptance
5. Explore spiritual growth together
6. Provide careful nurturing of each other and the relationship
7. Express to your partner:
   ”I Love and care about you”
   
   

Cultivating Intimacy leads to Commitment

PILLAR III: COMMITMENT

• The willful and cognitive side of love
• Looks toward a future that can not be seen and promises to be there
• Creates certainty in the swirling waters of uncertainty
• Is the basis of marriage and provides security when passion burns low and  difficult times arrive
• Determines the longevity of love and the health of a marriage
• The “COLD” of love
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             How to Cultivate Commitment

1. Embrace the high value of commitment
2. Meet your partners emotional needs
3. Honor your promises and the promises your partner makes to you
4. Know that you will stay together regardless of circumstances
5. Make your commitment part of  who you are as a person
6. Express to your partner:
   “I want to share my Life with you”
   
   Cultivating Commitment Secures a Marriage

Is your Marriage HOT, WARM or COLD? 

To be a healthy marriage you need to have all three Pillars, Passion, Intimacy and Commitment.  If not, call or email Sherri Hughes to receive a complimentary phone consultation and determine how to move forward for your self and your relationship’s benefit.